From: Alex Richards
Sent: 23 January 2010 03:02
To: info@thehappyegg.co.uk
Subject: eggcellent!
Dear the happy egg company,
Today, I was eating a happy egg (he was happy because he had been to his best friend's fancy dress party, he dressed as iron man) and was overcome by the deliciousness of the whole cataclysm of taste , and felt the need to write to you. (I'm not yolking!)
Eggs are probably my 4th favourite food, after milky ways, spaghetti hoops, and alphabites (I enjoy foods that help me stimulate my brain while I eat e.g. I use alphabites to create words, my best word is 'dungeon').
I am not just writing out of appreciation, as I have a few concerns. I would like to know how you ensure the morale of each hen is high, one of my hens, Juanita, is currently not laying eggs, and I'm unsure of whether this is relative to how content the hen is. I have tried everything to make her happy, I take her to the zoo, I bought her favourite brand of chicken feed, and I sometimes I just tickle her, but she just walks away patronisingly; it makes me feel so small.
I will have to investigate the matter thoroughly, and make sure that this depression has nothing to do with Yvonne, my other hen, and she is well known across the neighbourhood for her spicy attitude. It's not like Juanita is lacking in friendship, she has me, Yvonne, Terry and Steve the local ducks, Randolf the sheep dog, and Tyrone; her imaginary friend.
Anyway, I hope you will be able to help me with increasing the morale of my hen by replying as soon as possible with ideas, or anything, just to show that you received my email.
Thanking you
A. Richards
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Subject: RE: eggcellent!
Date: Mon, 25 Jan 2010 13:40:45 +0000
From: Victoria.DeGrandis@Noblefoods.co.uk
To: Alex Richards
Hi Alex,
Thank you for your email and interest in the happy egg co. We are glad to hear how much you are enjoying our lovely tasty eggs.
We are sorry to hear that Juanita has stopped laying eggs for you though. Do you know how old she is? It has been found that after about 65 weeks, a hens productivity decreases, so it could be possible that this is the reason she isn’t laying much at the moment.
Here at the happy egg co., we ensure a happy life for all our hens by keeping them busy and stimulated. We have special happy farms with farmers who are dedicated to looking after their girls and ensuring they are always having a happy time. The farms not only have wide open spaces where the hens are free to roam, they also have trees to play, sandpits to scratch around in and towers ideal for perching pleasure.
Although it sounds like you are doing lots to keep Juanita happy, perhaps you could try out some of the methods that we use. It will be interesting to hear if you have any success.
Kind Regards,
Victoria De Grandis
Marketing Assistant
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| From: | Alex Richards |
| Sent: | 25 January 2010 16:36:41 |
| To: | victoria.degrandis@noblefoods.co.uk; info@thehappyegg.co.uk |
Hello Victoria,
First and foremost I'd like to thank you for your prompt and enlightening reply, but I am afraid that there are a few more concerns.
Juanita and I watched the film "Chicken Run" last night, and I feel she is starting to get ideas. Just yesterday I came home from Ethel Austin to find Juanita with a catapult in the garden, but I doubt it'll come to anything, she's always lacked any real motivation. She always has these phases see, you know how hens are!
I've started to create some activities for Juanita, Yvonne and I to participate in, to keep active. I started with tennis, but Juanita failed to show any form of interest, which is surprising, as her favourite sports star is former tennis star 'Guy Forget', because he is not only skillful on the court but he is also a fantastic role model. Unfortunately we had to end early because Yvonne (typically) smashed up my other racquet after missing a simple forehand (it was a terrible shot on my account, it was there for the taking, I can understand her frustration. Also, her serve was way off, I'm talking 40% first serves in here). We then tried badminton, but of course, Yvonne spoiled the party again. She had one of her feminist rants after noticing that the thing we had to hit was called a 'shuttlecock' rather than a 'shuttlehen'.
I'm afraid I do not have much of an open space on my farm, so I am wondering if you have any ideas on how I could find somewhere for the hens to roam without a care in the world.
A prompt reply would be appreciated, to show that you received this email.
Thanking you
A. Richards
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