All comments are appreciated :)
From: Alex Richards
To: Swedish Tutor
Hi, I saw that you are offering Swedish language lessons, but I'm having a few problems and was wondering if you could answer a few questions?
Thanks.
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Sure, I would be more than glad to help you out. What do you need help with?
Setareh
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Well, I picked up some basic Swedish from Sesame street, I don't know if you are familiar with the character 'The Swedish Chef'? And they stated that the Swedish language is now defunct and has been replaced with the 'Hurdy Gurdy' language, and now I see someone offering Swedish lessons. I'm a little bit confused. Maybe you could shed some light on the situation?
Thanks.
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Alex,
To be completely honest with you I never heared about them at all, therefore it will be difficult for me to explain the differences as well.
Can I ask you why you chose to study Swedish - maybe I could still come in handy after all?
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You can come in very handy actually.
I'll tell you the whole story of why I've chosen to study Swedish. I used to live in Melbourne, Australia, and one day I took out a loan. Well, a month later the company I took a loan out of went bankrupt, and had been replaced with a different loan company who wanted me to pay double what I took out. So I fled the country, and moved to London, where I got a job as an accountant. I worked there for 6 years, but it seemed to be missing any fulfilment due to a non enjoyment of the job and a failure to befriend any of my colleagues. This led to a depression, I quit my job, I sold my car and I just couldn't cope with the stresses and loneliness of my life. My family convinced me to see a doctor, and he recommended a psychiatrist, who I went to see 3 times a week to discuss all my problems. He was a great help, and my depression seemed to just...pass within a few months, I felt like I had been reborn.
A few nights after I decided to go out for the first time in about 2 years, with some friends I met in Wiltshire, we had a few brewskis, slammed some pool, you know the jist? And that evening I met a beautiful girl named Evelyn, we got chatting. And then eventually, 4 years later we got married, and had a child named Duncan. Duncan is now 3 years old.
After more loan-related problems I moved to New York (my current location), but it seems that there has been more loan trouble here so I decided that I am going to move to Sweden. Whilst looking for holiday homes I stumbled upon your ad for Swedish lessons, and thought "This could be handy for when I move to Sweden", I then emailed you, and that leads to this moment in time.
So could we maybe discuss hours and prices etc?
Thanks.
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Hi Alex,
Wow that truly is a interesting story - would love to hear more about your life. I love travelling because I think you get more perspective on life and relationships (both with family and friends even yourself). Bet all these experiences in Australia, London and New York have all been necessary for you to get to this next phase of life together with your wife Evelyn. I am glad that you are moving to Sweden - the system is definetly better there compared to the system in the states :)
When are you planning to move?
As far as my service providing you with the swedish lessons I am very flexible. I do not work at the moment so I could meet up as often as you want to and adjust to your schedule pretty much. Just let me know when would be a good timing for you. From my previous experiences I have noticed a session around 2-2,5 hours is the best. Maybe 3 times per week?
It's completely up to you though :)
I suggest that we meet up during this week and take it from there. Do you have a book that we can look through together (you mentioned you've been studying some basics). And pricewise I take 80 dollars per hour.
Thank you for sharing your story, looking forward to hearing from you.
Setareh
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Hi Setareh, sorry I haven't replied for while, I've been sorting out transport for Sweden. We've struggled to get a plane from New York, so we've decided to just sail there. It's only a little bit further than the 'New York to Norway' sailing gala I attended in 2002, so we'll cope. There are no problems with your times and prices.
I have a hen Juanita, and she has (unbelievably) grasped a few English words since I've had her (I got her in 2007). So I was wondering if you'd be able to teach her a few words too?
Thanks.
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Definetly! As I said before I think an introductional meeting will do all of us good, then we can discuss what level you want the tutoring sessions to be at. Also get a chance to see how and what techniques of learning suits you best :)
I am more than open to help you both out, as a matter of fact this is helping me as well. Glad its mutual.
Wown I never knew that you could sail over, I guess I never thought about it. Nice that you are looking through different options in order to compare and get the most suitable alternative.
Talk soon,
Setareh
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I'm so glad. It's been tough to find a Swedish tutor who is willing to teach my hen. Maybe will the Swedish lessons Juanita will be able to communicate with Henrik, my sloth, so they stop fighting so much, Juanita can't lay eggs at all while in a hostile mood. So, I'm planning on moving to Sweden next Tuesday, so I was wondering if you could teach me the whole language within say, 3 days?
Thanks.
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Hahaha Alex, well in that case I guess we have to make it full days! Guess you don't have anything else to do now since you're moving right? ;)
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Well, I have to pack, take out life insurance on my wife and find a suitable melee weapon for reasons I will not reveal at this moment. So you can teach the whole language in 3 days?
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Nope, Alex I can't. But I will teach you as much as your mind is able to deal with.
You're funny Alex, enough with the jokes now :) Are you seriously moving on tuesday?
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Everything I've said has been serious (except for the whole insurance and melee weapon thing, I have to admit, I was humoring you a little there). I just hope you've been entirely serious on your part, I don't want this exchange to have been a gigantic waste of important time.
Thanks
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I fully agree. How are you planning to do this in 3 days?
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Well Setareh, you said it could be done. I hope you have not just wasted my time, that's all. I'm a powerful man, I can do powerful things.
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I did not say it could be done.
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Setareh, you said "Hahaha, well in that case I guess we have to make it full days!". Seeing as that was a lie, are you telling me you wont be able to teach my hen too?
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You asked me and I said "Nope". Guess there has been a few misunderstandings here.
Atleast you gave me a good laugh :)
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So Setareh, you can't teach my hen? You definitely said you could.
"Definetly! As I said before I think an introductional meeting will do all of us good, then we can discuss what level you want the tutoring sessions to be at. Also get a chance to see how and what techniques of learning suits you best :)
I am more than open to help you both out, as a matter of fact this is helping me as well. Glad its mutual."
It's nice to see that my custom is just a big fucking joke to you. I thought you could really help me out, I only had a departure time of Tuesday, because I thought you could really help me, but of course, you just thought you'd lie to me for shits and giggles. Now I have to postpone my moving YET AGAIN. Thanks a lot. Do you feel proud? care to explain yourself?
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Alex, I will teach you and do my best to try teaching your hen. You will not be able to learn the whole language in that amount of time though. My price is 80 per hour and I can meet you up if you want. That's all the information I have for now.
Don't have anything else to add nor explain.
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Oh, so now you CAN teach Juanita? You don't realise how much disruption your silly little jokes have caused.
Why did you insist on lying and ruining me and my family's dream move? I just told Evelyn about you and why we have to postpone our move yet again, she is now in tears. Are you still laughing?
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Alex, I dont know what to say
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Duncan hates you
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End of correspondence
