BNP

*The British National Party is a political party, seeking to restore the white ethnicity within the United Kingdom by getting rid of immigrants. Not a beef and pastry company.

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From: Alex Richards
To: The BNP

Dear BNP,
Hello there, I'm writing to say the Beef 'N' Pastries association has got to be in my top 5 favourite beef and pastry related associations based in the U.K. I especially admire your Danish pastries; rich in flavour, and don't ruin your figure. The beef you provide is so tender, it just melts in your mouth. I was just wondering whether you were going to add more to your selection of delicacies? I read last months 'Meat and various dessert ideas quarterly' and they claimed that you were going to add profiteroles to your list of pastries, but of course that contains ice cream; the flaw of your many contenders in the beef and pastry market. I'm sure you can pull it off guys. If this rumour is true, my word, I will not be able to contain my excitement. A reply of confirmation (or of anything) would be nice.

Thanking you
A. Richards
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Alex,

Have you considered seeking medical advice?

Probably best to stay off the drugs for a while.

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Just because I enjoy your products, it does not mean i'm on drugs, Mr. Modest! You should have more faith in what you produce and sell. Is there any chance of confirming the rumour?

A. Richards

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End of correspondence.